Helping Your Child Manage Anxiety: 3 Simple, Effective Strategies Every Parent Should Know
By Dr. Larsen, Founder and Clinical Director, Larsen Behavioral Wellness
Have you ever seen your child become overwhelmed with worry about something they are anticipating? For example, you may have a child that worries about events like going to the dentist or starting their first day of school. Indeed, many children struggle when new events/experiences are presented to them or when there are changes in their schedule and routine. When worry becomes overwhelming and interferes with your child’s ability to do things, it may reach the level of childhood anxiety. Anxiety is characterized by persistent worry about the future, present or past.
As a child clinical psychologist with over 2 decades of experience supporting children and families through anxiety, I see how overwhelming it can feel when your child struggles with worries that seem bigger than they are. Anxiety in kids often shows up as stomachaches, avoidance of school or activities, clinginess, or trouble sleeping. However, with the right tools, children can often learn to calm their bodies and minds effectively. Early intervention makes a big difference, and the strategies I share today are drawn from evidence-based approaches like Cognitive Behavior Therapy and mindfulness that I use every day in my child therapy practice at Larsen Behavioral Wellness.
Here are three powerful, kid-friendly, research-based strategies that truly work:
1. Deep Breathing
When anxiety strikes, a child’s body goes into “fight-or-flight” mode and the sympathetic nervous system is activated. This is characterized by breathing that is shallow and fast. Their heart will race, and they may become flushed and sweaty. Deep breathing activates the body’s natural relaxation response. The “relax” part of the nervous system is the parasympathetic nervous system (PSNS), which is the calming, rest-and-digest branch of the autonomic nervous system. It is responsible for slowing down your body’s activity after stress or danger, helping you return to a resting state. It works in opposition to the sympathetic nervous system.
To help your child with these biological responses to stress and activate the PSNS, teach the “balloon breathing” technique. First, have them place a hand on their belly. Then have them breathe in slowly through the nose for four counts (inflating the “balloon” in their tummy), hold for two counts, and exhale gently through the mouth for four counts (deflating the balloon). Do this for 3-5 rounds.
It is best to practice together when everyone is calm. Great times to do this are before bedtime or in the morning. Practicing while calm helps your child learn the skill, so it becomes an automatic tool that they don’t need to think about how to do it when they are nervous. You can even make it fun with a stuffed animal on their belly to watch it rise and fall. Many kids notice their worries feel smaller after just a minute or two of this practice.
2. Positive Visualizations
Our brains are wired to imagine things, and anxious kids often picture worse-case scenarios. Positive visualization helps them flip the script by guiding them to create calming mental images. Help your child create their “happy place” scene. It is different for every kid. Ask them, “where in your life have you felt particularly safe and calm?” Perhaps it is a beach, a favorite park, a vacation place, their bedroom, or a cozy reading nook with their favorite stuffed animals.
After you’ve identified a place, guide them through a 5 senses version of it: “Close your eyes and picture yourself there. What do you see? What do you hear? How does it feel?” Encourage them to add as many sensory details as possible. You can practice this while calm so during stressful events they can use the technique. These short, guided visualizations (even 2–3 minutes) before a stressful event, like a test or doctor’s visit, can reduce anticipatory anxiety dramatically. You can record a simple audio recording on your phone and have them listen to it before their stressful event.
3. Positive Thinking (Thought Reframing)
Anxious, anticipatory thoughts often sound like “What if I mess up?” or “Everyone will laugh at me.” Positive thinking helps children challenge these unhelpful thoughts and replace them with more balanced, realistic, or encouraging ones. Parents can start encouraging positive thinking by teaching their children to notice the worried thoughts. After kids have identified the negative thought, parents can then ask gentle, probing questions like, “Is that thought 100% true? What’s another way to look at this?”
Parents can also turn thought changing into a game with “thought bubbles”. Start with a drawing or imagine the worried thought in one bubble. Then put the helpful thought in another bubble. For example, “What if I fail?” can become “I’ve practiced, and I can do my best.” Encourage kids to focus on the positive reframes and let the worried though float away into the air. Over time, this skill helps kids feel more in control of their inner dialogue.
These strategies are most effective when practiced regularly in low-stress moments. This way the skills are honed for when stressful events present themselves. As a parent you can model these skills. Kids learn best by watching others succeed.
How Therapy Can Help
Together, deep breathing, positive visualization and thought reframing are powerful tools to help children (and their parents) overcome anxiety, worry, and overwhelm. These tools work together to prevent the body from activating the biological “fight or flight” mode stress response and in the case of deep breathing, help to reverse it. Taken together and practiced regularly, these skills can help children to face their fears and bravely navigate uncharted territory. Over time and repetition, doing difficult things helps kids build confidence and makes them resilient to hardships.
At Larsen Behavioral Wellness, we specialize in therapy for kids with anxiety. By using evidence-based treatment approaches, kids and families build these and many more skills through personalized, effective, in-person play therapies. Whether your child is dealing with anxiety, ADHD, trauma, or everyday emotional challenges, our warm and supportive team creates tailored plans that empower kids and strengthen family connections.