Signs Your Child May Need Therapy (and how to help).

Parents often feel they need to wait for something big to happen to call for therapy. It’s common to hear from parents at intake sessions, “we just didn’t know if the issue was really something that needed a professional.”

Knowing when to call in a professional for help can be confusing. Parents often don’t want to overreact to a normal part of development, or conversely, some parents are quick to call in reinforcements for fear of what might happen.

Knowing when should a child see a therapist can be tricky. Here are some general guidelines that your child might benefit from therapy with a trained child therapist.

Guideline 1: Your child has had a big change in behavior.

Parents often note something specifically changing about a child’s behavior before they call. One parent recently reported that they knew it was time to ask for help when their child refused to go to a friend’s party for the third time that month.

Seeing your child struggle with normal activities such as going to school, finishing assignments on time, engaging at parties or with peers are signs that there may be an underlying issue. For some kids, the behavior changes might come in the form of a regression.

For example, a child who has been potty trained for months suddenly begins having accidents before going to bed at night. Or alternatively, behavior changes may come in the form of increases in risk taking.

Your teen may be driving safely for months only to find they have been driving erratically and getting speeding tickets.

Guideline 2: Your child’s emotions seem to change.

   As children develop, their emotional experiences and expressions change. It’s normal for children to experience wider range of emotions and more complex and nuanced combinations of emotions as they age. However, if you notice extremes or wide swings in emotions, this might be a sign something is wrong. A recent teen client reported that she knew she needed help when she would have uncontrollable spouts of crying. “Sometimes it felt like I didn’t even know what I was crying about.”

Another emotional sign when should a child see a therapist is when they demonstrate excessive worry or anxiety. Fears about what might happen often lead to children avoiding events, places, or people. This can disrupt routines and cause children to feel incapable of doing things on their own. It’s important to seek out help if you notice a child is suffering with irrational fears as they likely will get worse without help.

When a child is struggling with depressive symptoms you might notice a marked shift in them. They may become overly tearful, withdraw, become irritable and/or angry. Depression causes children to feel hopeless about the future and feel powerless to change their circumstances. If kids stop doing things they used to enjoy, withdrawal socially from their peers, and seem to lack motivation at school or in extra curriculars, it may be a sign they need help.

Guideline 3: Social issues are prevalent

For teens, friends often notice problems before parents do. It’s helpful to have an open line of communication with your child’s peers if you suspect they may be silently struggling. Often time, social isolation is a sign that your child may need therapy. One parent recently explained about their child, “They shared that they felt left out and didn’t try to make things better. I think she may have been oversensitive to her friends. Things seemed to get blown out of proportion for her.” If any of this sounds familiar, child therapy can help your child overcome social issues associated with depression and anxiety.

Guideline 4: Signs to get immediate help

Teen suicide is unfortunately a reality in today’s world. The rates of teen suicide have stabilized since the peak during the covid pandemic, and sit a roughly 13.5 per 100,000. Suicide is the second leading cause of death for 10-14 year olds and their leading cause for ages 15-24. There are often signs that a teen is struggling before they take their own life. If your teen is talking about death a lot or making statements that the world would be better without them in it, that is a sign they need immediate help. Other signs, such as giving away their personal items or saying goodbye to people are also signs. Do not ignore these signs. If you need immediate help, the national suicide hotline- call or text 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline) — available 24/7. Or contact the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741741.

As a parent in New Jersey, resources like your pediatrician, school counselor, or local mental health services (e.g., through NJ’s Department of Children and Families) can help connect you to support. Trust your instincts—if your teen shows signs like those we discussed earlier, reach out promptly. It’s important to be alert to the signs of suicide.

Guideline 5: Trust your instincts

As a parent you often sense issues with your children well before they verbalize them to you or others notice. If your gut instinct is telling you something is off, listen to it. Ask your child what thoughts are going through their mind.

Listen to them. Don’t try to solve issues immediately. Don’t judge your child. When your child opens up, just try to listen for emotions. It’s usually time to talk with a therapist at this point, when you are unable to find solutions and problems just continue to fester.

In conclusion it can be difficult to know when it’s time to call in reinforcements to help with your child’s mental help. Most parents report seeing shifts in behavior well before they seek out help. It’s important not to wait if you think your child is struggling. Get help early to address the issues before they fester. Reach out today to schedule an intake with Larsen Behavioral Wellness to be matched with a therapist who specializes in the area of your need.